A Real Soda Buzz
For those of you who follow this blog (hi mom), you will remember I wrote about Taser use by police a little while ago. Now this is one of those issues that polarizes the nation just like abortion, Iraq, and who would win a fight between Gandalf and Yoda. Some people say Tasers are necessary to neutralizing potentially dangerous and aggressive criminals. Others say Tasers are too dangerous, and because a few people have died, it’s not worth it and we should use rocket-propelled grenades instead.
Well Tasers were in the news this week in a big way. I’ll relay that story in a moment, but I want you to remember that Tasers only make the news when something goes wrong. If some perp is high on meth and charging a cop and is taken down effectively with a Taser, it will not appear on the news (unless the perp is fried all dead-like).
Some of you might be thinking, I’m going to tell the story about the 68 year-old grandmother who got tased five times in a police station waiting room. And…I guess I did just now… (http://www.nbc4.tv/news/5493614/detail.html?rss=la&psp=nationalnews)
But the real story I want to talk about comes from Hamtramck, Michigan. Officers Ronald Dupuis and Prema Graham are driving down the street when Dupuis gets a little thirsty. He suggests Graham pull over so he can get a soda. She says “no”. Well, you know how Ronald can get. He grabs the wheel and they start fighting for control of the squad car. I guess Prema was putting up a good fight, and you know Ronald always has to win (remember last Thanksgiving?). So to get an edge he fires his Taser into her leg … while she’s driving. He really wanted that soda. Well Prema wasn’t seriously injured and Ronald was fired and is facing time in prison (we all knew it would happen someday).
(http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/taser_assault;_ylt=AiWZwz7.SiQ_
KjbVeFobJCLtiBIF;_
ylu=X3oDMTA5aHJvMDdwBHNlYwN5bmNhdA--)
So should officers be issued Tasers? I still have to say yes. If Ronald didn’t have his Taser, he may have gone for a gun (it was in the backseat next to the case of Pepsi).
Bonus Blog
Gandalf vs. Yoda
Okay after I wrote that I really started thinking who would actually win this fight. The x-factor here is that we really don’t know the full extent of Gandalf’s powers. In the movies he tends to shine brightly and deflect weapons. This can be useful when fighting bandits or looking for something in the trunk at night.
Yoda however had the force and could move stuff around just by waving his hands. This could come in handy when moving or playing pool.
I guess we first need to identify what these guys would be fighting over. This will help us understand what intensity they fight with. Let’s say Gandalf and Yoda are riding a horse in the woods. They’re having a good talk about how enlightened and old they are when they come across the Prancing Pony Tavern. Gandalf keeps on riding, but Yoda wants to stop for a drink. Gandalf says “no”. Yoda whips out his Taser and pegs Gandalf in the leg. Well, now it’s on!
Gandalf immediately shines brightly and Yoda waves his hands and arranges a pile of stones into a pyramid. The light from Gandalf’s staff sends a red beam into the base of the pyramid and tells them where to find the Lost Ark of the Covenant. They team up together with Sala and start digging for the relic when they are set upon by Nazis and Orcs.
Yoda waves his hands and the rocks from the pyramid fly forth towards the Nazis and Orcs like whirling dervishes. They are hit again and again until they are lying on the ground motionless. Gandalf shines brightly to make sure their dead. When they turn around, Sala is gone with the Ark.
They start blaming each other and then fight again and Yoda loses because he’s too short.
Well Tasers were in the news this week in a big way. I’ll relay that story in a moment, but I want you to remember that Tasers only make the news when something goes wrong. If some perp is high on meth and charging a cop and is taken down effectively with a Taser, it will not appear on the news (unless the perp is fried all dead-like).
Some of you might be thinking, I’m going to tell the story about the 68 year-old grandmother who got tased five times in a police station waiting room. And…I guess I did just now… (http://www.nbc4.tv/news/5493614/detail.html?rss=la&psp=nationalnews)
But the real story I want to talk about comes from Hamtramck, Michigan. Officers Ronald Dupuis and Prema Graham are driving down the street when Dupuis gets a little thirsty. He suggests Graham pull over so he can get a soda. She says “no”. Well, you know how Ronald can get. He grabs the wheel and they start fighting for control of the squad car. I guess Prema was putting up a good fight, and you know Ronald always has to win (remember last Thanksgiving?). So to get an edge he fires his Taser into her leg … while she’s driving. He really wanted that soda. Well Prema wasn’t seriously injured and Ronald was fired and is facing time in prison (we all knew it would happen someday).
(http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/taser_assault;_ylt=AiWZwz7.SiQ_
KjbVeFobJCLtiBIF;_
ylu=X3oDMTA5aHJvMDdwBHNlYwN5bmNhdA--)
So should officers be issued Tasers? I still have to say yes. If Ronald didn’t have his Taser, he may have gone for a gun (it was in the backseat next to the case of Pepsi).
Bonus Blog
Gandalf vs. Yoda
Okay after I wrote that I really started thinking who would actually win this fight. The x-factor here is that we really don’t know the full extent of Gandalf’s powers. In the movies he tends to shine brightly and deflect weapons. This can be useful when fighting bandits or looking for something in the trunk at night.
Yoda however had the force and could move stuff around just by waving his hands. This could come in handy when moving or playing pool.
I guess we first need to identify what these guys would be fighting over. This will help us understand what intensity they fight with. Let’s say Gandalf and Yoda are riding a horse in the woods. They’re having a good talk about how enlightened and old they are when they come across the Prancing Pony Tavern. Gandalf keeps on riding, but Yoda wants to stop for a drink. Gandalf says “no”. Yoda whips out his Taser and pegs Gandalf in the leg. Well, now it’s on!
Gandalf immediately shines brightly and Yoda waves his hands and arranges a pile of stones into a pyramid. The light from Gandalf’s staff sends a red beam into the base of the pyramid and tells them where to find the Lost Ark of the Covenant. They team up together with Sala and start digging for the relic when they are set upon by Nazis and Orcs.
Yoda waves his hands and the rocks from the pyramid fly forth towards the Nazis and Orcs like whirling dervishes. They are hit again and again until they are lying on the ground motionless. Gandalf shines brightly to make sure their dead. When they turn around, Sala is gone with the Ark.
They start blaming each other and then fight again and Yoda loses because he’s too short.
posted by AaronJLohr | 8:54 AM
4 Comments:
The answer to the question lies in the fact that both Gandalf and Yoda fought characters played by the actor Christopher Lee(Count Dooko and Sauromon)(Sp?).
In LOTR, Gandalf gets straight up butt-whooped by Christopher Lee, while in Star Wars, Yoda and Dooko pretty much draw(I think Dooko escapes or something). This evidence suggests that despite Yoda's lack of height, he is the better fighter.
I think it is also important to weigh the fact that Lee died pretty pathetically in both follow up movies(in LOTR he gets killed by slow moving trees(which if he had any brains, he would have set on fire and easily defeated) and gets shalacked in a sword fight by Annakin in Star Wars). Now, if you' like to make an arguement that one of Lee's characters was more powerful than the other, I think the answer to that question lies in their character's respective deaths. In LOTR, killed by trees...in Star Wars, defeated by one of the most powerful Jedi Knights with mad crazy amount of Midichlorians(If I misspelled that one, I think it should actually be OK, because it proves I'm not a huge loser). The Lee in Star Wars was arguably stronger.
Now, I know the argument could be made that Lee only defeated Gandalf the Grey and not Gandalf the White. It was clear that Gandalf the White was a little different, and perhaps, better in a lot of ways.
But still, I think you have to look at the evidence we are provided with, and in that case, I think Yoda still wins, and leaves Gandalf on top of some huge tower until he is rescued by a huge bird.
Your comment is well thought out and indeed spurred further ideas of my own. I think Gandalf the Grey was certainly weaker. While he dreamed of one day being able to shine brightly, he had to settle for setting off fireworks. But when he became Gandalf the White, he couldn't stop lighting up (terrible habit).
So we have to define which Gandalf we're using. Let's say white, since he did some shining.
But we also have to define which Yoda we're using. The young and active Yoda or the old and tired Yoda. The young Yoda would flip around in the air, absorb long falls, and just kick butt in general. The old Yoda had to be carried around, made questionable stew, and went to bed at 7:30. But he was okay at moving stuff around (boxes, rocks, X-wings).
So, now we're looking at Gandalf the White vs. Old Yoda, and I think we know who's shorter (and calls it a night after Whell of Fortune).
It's "Wheel" of Fortune, not "Whell"
Whell, whell, whell. It looks like the spelling police officer has returned. Or maybee yer juss too peepil with the saim preeokyoopayshun with werds.
All this talk has made me hungry. I fell like pelling an orange. If you relly want to eat whell you should have fruit with your mell.
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